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Hey there welcome to my very very naughty place!

Thursday, December 11, 2014

Christmas Sex



I'm already starting to get into the christmas spirit and I hope you are too, but if you haven't yet come read these positions. Maybe me and you will have to try them out!!

Jingle Balls

This move centers around some classic teabaging, either before, during or after intercourse. So whenever you decide to do it,  walk to the kitchen and frost your schwetty balls with leftover green and red frosting from the Christmas cookies to appeal to her sweet tooth and ensure extra-intense tongue action.

Santa’s Little Helpers

Men, quit worrying about being “big” enough and start to think small; try imitating elves and have sex on your knees. A little pocket rocket vibrator can provide the elfin magic. Your usual smooth bass bedroom voice will ruin the whole thing, so keep helium close by to take hits and talk dirty in a higher octave. It’s going to be a busy night on your part, but at least she can pretend she was with another guy while you maintain a size advantage in reality.

Silent Night

Not only is Christmas a great time for sex, it is also a time when family can be a little too close at all the wrong times. So this year, make the most of it by engaging in some exciting secret holiday sex with your partner at a very unsuspecting time: Christmas dinner. The goal is for you and your partner to separately excuse yourselves in the middle of dinner, without arousing suspicion, then make your way up to an available bedroom for a quickie.

The Stocking Stuffer

This Christmas sex position combines stockings and sex in close quarters. She’ll be in crotchless or strategically ripped stockings, and you’ll both zip into a sleeping bag together. From there, engage in any and all positions allowable by your physiques and your encased bedding. Closeness and friction will be the two factors you experience. After a while, you may get a whiff of hot nylon and/or singed hair. The decision to proceed will be yours; just remember the phrase “you would even say it glows” can apply to more than Rudolph’s nose.


Snow Angel

So far, our Christmas sex positions have probably found you indoors, out of the cold.  Even with the all the rockin’ she’s been doing around your Christmas tree, cabin fever might be setting in. Good news: You can get fresh air and still get some when you go outside to make snow angels. Way better than a snowman with a frosty schlong grafted on, these snow angels decorate the lawn beautifully and make for great stories to share. You’ll have distinct his-and-her patterns, too. When you’re on top in the missionary position, you’ll be in charge of swinging out your legs, making for a taller angel. When she’s on top, her knee impressions will make for a more bootylicious angel.


Does it put you in the mood? I sure hope so!! I'd love for you to cum play with me....who knows maybe we can make up our own! ;)

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